Many women don’t realize they have ADHD until they’re well into adulthood—often after years of feeling overwhelmed or misunderstood. What are some of the most common signs of “invisible ADHD” you see in midlife women, and why do they so often fly under the radar? We fly under the radar because our ADHD symptoms are very internal, in general. When we were growing up, usually the more rambunctious, disruptive kids would get called out, and they would be the ones getting the phone calls and their parents would know about it. But girls, in general—and I want to stress in general—tend to be much more in their minds and in their head. Their hyperactivity is internal restlessness and thoughts, ruminating and worrying, thinking about tomorrow and yesterday and five days from now and seven years away—all at the same time, and you can't see it. So, it's like the opposite of being disruptive, and so we get overlooked.
In my book, I literally use the phrase “overwhelmed all the time,” which should be the catch phrase for women with ADHD—it's overwhelmed to the point where you just don’t know what to do when. I call it the “deer caught in headlight” syndrome.
You’ve said that traditional ADHD strategies often fall short for women. What makes your kinesthetic, action-based coaching approach different—and why do you think it resonates so deeply with women who’ve felt stuck for years? I think that what we do is a little bit unique with our program: We have people get into action with their coach. If you want to get in shape, and I'm like, “You should do, you know, 20 push-ups every morning, and then go do some weights, and then I want you to do three sets and two reps of this other arm exercise,” you'd be like, “Wow, that sounds really great. I'm totally gonna do that.” And then you never do. There’s zero accountability.
But I'd be like, “OK, here's what I want you to do. We're gonna do, you know, three push ups right now. Can you please get on the floor and let's do that together on Zoom.” And now, I'm correcting your form. Now, you've practiced it. Just the fact that you've actually physically done it, even though it was a super small step that you took with me on Zoom, it's so much easier for you to do it later that day. Also, what makes it unique is that we get into the deeper issues of what stops people from following through and what they know they should do, which is we break things down to such minute steps that it's impossible not to do them. Your book is packed with real-world tools and strategies that go beyond the usual advice. If a reader could only implement one shift today to start moving forward with more clarity and confidence, what would you recommend? If I had to choose just one thing, I would purposefully create five physical state changes that you know100% this is doable for you. I can listen to a song. I can get off my bum and, like, go on my balcony and just breathe. I can play with my dog. Something that's a no brainer. Do not go get into workout clothes and go to the gym. That's not gonna happen if you don't feel like it. But something that's a no brainer, write those five things down, OK? And then, when you start to digress, or go into some rabbit hole on the internet, instantly look at your list and just pick one.
How do you find flow—that moment, or ability, to be fully immersed and present in the moment—in your life? Anytime I'm doing something that feels exciting. I tend to fill up my days with things that are fun and exciting, like even just my company. It's so funny, because I never used to stick with jobs; I was the epitome of the people I talk about in my book where you're just going from job to job to job, but if you're doing something you legitimately enjoy, and you're working towards any goal, that's what puts me in that space. Because I'm creating, whatever it is, even if it doesn't work out, because a lot of things that I create don't work out. But it doesn't matter, just that whole idea of creation, that's amazing. It's the best. | 
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